This is goodbye, sweethearts.
Not like, a long goodbye, or a final goodbye. This is comma or a semicolon, not a period. I’m not getting married, or undergoing a sex change, or going into witness protection or anything. No one has knocked me up, and when they try to make me go to rehab, I’m still all like, “No, no, no.”
What actually is going on is that I’m taking a very small break from blogging so I can pursue a Very Big Thing. I cannot say exactly what this Very Big Thing is yet, because that would suck all of the fun out of it like a vacuum hose around an erect penis (note: please don’t try that home). But it’s an awesome big thing, very cool, totally awesome, you’ll all fucking love it. Swear to God.
Have the decency to miss me a little, my darlings, but do not mourn my absence because I’ll be back by New Year’s day to continue to deliver sub-par erotica to the glorious internets.
And I’m bringing friends 😉